2 posts tagged “excuses”
But only if he's Muslim, ladies. Only if he's Muslim.
Today I was driving to work (something I hardly ever do as I live in BOSTON, land of Confused GPS Systems) and was listening to the morning radio show on JAMN 94.5 with Ramiro (the freakin' Peurto Rican) and co-hosts Pebbles and Melissa. My favorite part of the show is always when Ramiro leaves (he's funny but needs to let the women talk more) and Pebs and Mel (my secret nicknames because I feel like if we got to know each other we'd all be BFFs) do their "Ladies Room" segment. Today's topic was "The Best Way to Break Up with a Guy".
Melissa suggested telling him you have a new man, while Pebs was straight up an "I'm just not interested" kind of a gal. Both agreed that it should be quick and as painless as possible. Then they opened the floor for suggestions. I couldn't BELIEVE what some of the women who called in proposed!
Caller #1: "I've never broken up with anyone I've dated. You have to make them break up with you. Make it seem like it's your fault. It will boost their ego and you're in the clear."
Pebbles: "Well, how do you get the guy to break up with you? What if he doesn't take the hint?"
Caller #1: "Just do a bunch of stuff he doesn't like. Such as for instance, right now I'm dating a muslim guy. So if I wanted to break up with him, see, it's against their religion to eat pork right? So I'd just cook him up some pork!"
Dating Diva (to herself): Did I ever accidentally eat pork in front of Mr. Morocco?
In all seriousness...what??? What is this lady talking about?? Is she serious? And the next caller totally agreed with her, but went so far as to say that if a guy won't leave you alone you should just change your number and change your locks, avoid all places he might be, etc. etc.
Sorry but this is way too much work and totally unnecessary. As my favorite caller put it, "Just tell a guy it's not going to work out and if he doesn't get the hint, ask one of your guy friends to call him and tell him to leave you alone". I agree completely. It's mean and cowardly to drive someone to break it off with you, and just weird to cut someone off so completely like that.
Plus, like Pebbles said, I LOVE my number. No way am I changing it for some guy!
But always remember that if you are dating a Muslim stalker who won't go away, you can always scare him away by feeding him some pork cooked in alcohol or something...
After something of a hiatus from our first date and claiming he had my number wrong, the Football Player finally asked me out for a second date. We were supposed to get dinner and catch a movie last night, and he said he would call on Saturday to confirm the details.
Saturday came and went with no phone call. Finally on Sunday at 11 am I get the following text:
"Hey babe. I'm going to have to cancel for tonight. I'm sick and I'm texting you because I lost my voice. can we reschedule? Much love, football player".
I texted back and said that would be fine, as I had no desire to hang out with someone who was sick anyway. But in the back of my mind I was thinking "this guy gets sick a lot". He had been out of commission for awhile due to what he called "flu-like syptoms" a couple of weeks back. A few texts later I learn that his newest cold is due to him out partying all night and not wearing a coat. (bear in mind that we live in new england, folks).
This is monumentally stupid. And the man is 36. Grow up! I went to a party this weekend too but I'm not incapacitated due to it. Some people just can't stop trying to re-live their glory days...
